(I would show myself out but I have nowhere to go.)

Pop culture makes it seem like lawyers are constantly in court, or at the very least, catching up with our attorney friends while briskly walking down courthouse steps. It really looks more like the graphic accompanying this blog entry, but with a coffee cup balanced precariously in there (and in my case, more paper despite being promised a paperless office by the year 2000, a comfortable new office chair just sitting in the box, taunting me while waiting to be assembled, and a room in dire need of new paint—it ain’t pretty, folks).

All of this tech means that most of my job, like most of most lawyers’ jobs, can be done from home. As of tomorrow, most of Wisconsin will be (or should be) staying at home by order of the Governor. Other states have done so, and more will, despite the federal government balking (but This Blog Is Not About Politics so I will not go there). I’ve been doing so since close of business March 13, with the occasional socially distant trip to the grocery store (which is still permitted under the order). Legal services are considered “essential” under the order, but we are directed to do as much as possible remotely and I will do so. My firm is open for business, but virtually.

I admit, when discussion of remote offices/hoteling comes up, I’m resistant. I like having somewhere to be. I’m not at my best without an externally imposed schedule. Also, I’m a bit of an extrovert and I miss having people I’m not related to to talk to. Sure, they interrupt, but they’re not interrupting with “so, um, mom…I don’t think the toaster is broken, but I’m not sure how to get burned Nutella out of it…”

Anyhow, Day 11 is going okay enough. I’m not a fan, but I’m dealing. I hope everyone out there is dealing and doing okay enough.

This crisis is of course forcing change on everyone, in a real hurry, and some of this change is going to be permanent. But that’s nature, right? The only constant is change (though most of us prefer our change to be not as radical and not as scary and not as immediate).

That said, I graduated from law school in 2009. The first few weeks of Legal Research and Writing I were spent learning how to use reporters—you know, those dusty books in the library? Even as we were told, “we’re also learning Westlaw and Lexis,” we had to learn the basics first. (It should be noted that I did not first stumble upon snark after law school, and I’m pretty sure I asked my prof if we would ever find ourselves on a desert island with the only way out being able to Shepardize by hand. We’re friends now. It’s all good.)

Even in the decade-plus since graduation, things have changed. I’m not sure if they teach the books now (do they?) but other than that one time I had no data signal and no wifi in the basement law library in the state capitol (c. 2012, I guess that was my desert island) I have not opened a reporter since 1L. Research, other than the occasional State Bar “brown book,” is exclusively online (though I admit I brought my paper copy of the annotated Supreme Court Rules home with me, maybe more as a security blanket than anything). Court filings are electronic (though as of now, I am unaware of any order waiving requirements to file paper copies of appellate briefs—if you need to do so even though you can’t print anything right now, it may be necessary to file a motion seeking an extension or waiver of the paper requirement). Payment is electronic. Marketing is electronic.

Anyway—now is a good time to take quick stock of whether your electronics and other work-at-home processes are doing their job, ethically speaking (you knew I couldn’t get away from that, right?):

• You remembered to shut off your auto-post/auto-email features until you made sure you weren’t sending anything out that was incorrect, misleading, or insensitive, right? “Schedule your free in-office consultation today!” should be wrong, and while I hope that the disciplinary authorities won’t be focusing on something like that in a time like this, it’s still misleading per SCR 20:7.1. If you were planning to promote a seminar you were teaching or an event your firm was hosting, make sure you take that down—again, I don’t see an errant event promotion leading to discipline (I hope) but it looks a bit out-of-touch and you don’t need “what? are you crazy?” comments on social media.

• Likewise, make sure your website is updated with current contact information. If you are available by Skype, FaceTime, Zoom, or other services, feel free to mention that, but make sure you’re actually available and competent. We’re all going to have the occasional fuzzy connection or dropped call (especially if our spouse is also Zooming into a meeting and our kid is, um, learning physics and problem solving through networked video games) but if you just don’t have the tech or the knowledge to handle a certain mode of communication, don’t use it.

• It’s OK to market your business and you should—people still need legal services—but be sensitive about what you’re doing. We’ve all been inundated with “What Amalgamated Frozen Pancake Corp. Is Doing About the Pandemic” emails; most have been at least somewhat tasteful. Think twice about using doom, gloom, and panic as your backdrop.

• Make sure you have all of your passwords somewhere, not just set to auto-fill. Help desks will likely be harder to reach and you don’t want to be filing on a deadline with no recourse. No, writing your passwords on sticky notes stuck to your monitor still isn’t a good idea (unless, I suppose, you live alone and your cat doesn’t prefer Post-Its to cat toys).

• Even though you don’t have to go anywhere or print anything to file a motion, think long and hard about what an “emergency” and “irreparable harm” mean. Needless to say, “infringing unicorns” might make a good band name but it’s not a reason to consume court resources.

• If your space is shared, you really do need somewhere private to hold client conversations. I’m not really sure if having a pre-verbal baby on your lap is going to implicate the attorney-client privilege with everything else going on, but your roommate sitting there on your couch eating a ham sandwich will. An office with a door that closes is ideal. I am hesitant to recommend the bathroom for this purpose, but perhaps as a last resort, we gotta do what we gotta do. Just don’t multitask.

• And your smart device (such as Alexa or Google’s voice assistant) may be eavesdropping on you as well—if you do have one, make sure your workspace is far out of range. (Mine lives on an entirely different floor of my house so my kid can use it to cheat at spelling.)

That’s it for now. ‘m sure I’ll have more later. In the meantime, please continue to stay safe and sane, everyone.